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Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Sunday, December 29, 2013
بیماریاں اور ان کا علاج
6:33 AM
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بیماریاں اور ان کا علاج ------------------------ ہڈحرامی اور سستی
اس مرض میں مبتلا مریض کام کو دیکھ کر کانپنے لگتا ہے اس کے ہاتھ پاؤں
پھول جاتے ہیں ہاتھ پے ہاتھ دھرے بٹھیے رہنے سے مریض کو خاصا سکون ملتا ہے
اگر کوئی کام فورا کرنا ہو تو مرض کو غشی کا دورہ پڑ سکتا ہے جس سے وہ جان
سے ہاتھ دھو سکتا ہے مریض ہر کام کے لیے اضافی وقت کا مطالبہ کرتا ہے اور
کام کی تکمیل کیلیے چور دروازے ڈھونڈتا ہے. علاج * مریض کے بہانوں پر ہر گز کان نہ دھرین. * ہر کام ڈندے کے زور پر کروائیں.
* دو عدد پرانے جوتے رات کو پانی میں بھگو کر راکھ دیں اگر مریض خوش دلی...
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Thursday, December 26, 2013
Isnt it weird we have one hand that knows how to do...
11:19 AM
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Isn't it weird we have one hand that knows how to do everything & then one hand that just sits there like “I don't know how to hold a penci...
Monday, December 23, 2013
Sunday, December 22, 2013
Bob and his wife in Winter...
7:41 PM
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One winter morning while listening to the radio, Bob and his wife hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 4-6 inches of snow today.
You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."
Bob's wife goes out and moves her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio
announcer says, "We are expecting 6-8 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."
Bob's wife goes out and moves her car again.
The next week they...
Saturday, December 21, 2013
"The reason a lot of people do not recognize opportunity is because it usually goes around wearing overalls looking like hard work."
5:43 AM
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"The reason a lot of people do not recognize opportunity is because it
usually goes around wearing overalls looking like hard work." - Thomas A. Edis...
Friday, December 20, 2013
Please pray 4 me My Condition is serious. I am Getting Day by day.
10:36 PM
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Please pray 4 me My Condition is serious. I am Getting Day by day. . . . . . . . More Beautiful More Good Looking - More Cute- Dua Kro menu nazar na Lge ...
I love my eyes when u look into them.
5:22 AM
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I love my eyes when u look into them. I love my name when u speak it. I love my life bcoz u are in it. I love myself bcoz u make me feel loved <3 p=""&g...
عورت تو پاؤں کی جوتی ہوا کرتی ہے،
5:00 AM
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ایک شادی شدہ نے کہا : عورت تو پاؤں کی جوتی ہوا کرتی ہے، مرد کو جب بھی اپنے لئے کوئی مناسب سائز کی نظر آئے بدل لیا کرے۔ سننے والوں نے محفل میں بیٹھے ہوئے ایک دانا کی طرف دیکھااور پوچھا: اس شخص کی کہی ہوئی اس بات کے بارے میں آپ کی کیا رائے ہے؟
اس نے جواب دیا: جو کچھ اس شخص نے کہا ہے بالکل صحیح کہا ہے۔ عورت جوتی کی
مانند ہے ہر اس شخص کے لئے جو اپنے آپ کو پاؤں کی مانند سمجھتا ہے۔ جبکہ عورت ایک تاج کی مانند بھی ہو سکتی ہے مگر اس شخص کے لئے جو اپنےآپ کو بادشاہ کی مانند سمجھتا ہو۔
کسی آدمی کو اس کی کہی ہوئی بات کی وجہ سے کوئی الزام نا دو، بس اتنا...
Dharam Pita means - Not real father..
4:58 AM
1 comment
Dharam Pita means - Not real father.. Dharam Bhai means :- not real brother.. Dharam sister means :- not real sister.. . . Then why ?? . . . Dharam patni means - Real wife......
Thursday, December 19, 2013
ﺍﻧﺴﺎﻥ ﺑﮍﺍ ﮨﯽ ﺳﺨﺖ ﺟﺎﻥ ﮨﮯ ۔ ﺟﺲ ﺑﺎﺕ ﮐﺎ ﺗﺼﻮﺭ ﺑﮭﯽ ﺑﺮﺩﺍﺷﺖ ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ﮐﺮ ﺳﮑﺘﺎ
9:34 PM
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ﺍﻧﺴﺎﻥ ﺑﮍﺍ ﮨﯽ ﺳﺨﺖ ﺟﺎﻥ ﮨﮯ ۔ ﺟﺲ ﺑﺎﺕ ﮐﺎ ﺗﺼﻮﺭ ﺑﮭﯽ ﺑﺮﺩﺍﺷﺖ ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ﮐﺮ ﺳﮑﺘﺎ ۔ ﺟﺐ ﻭﮦ ﺣﻘﯿﻘﺖ ﺑﻦ ﮐﺮ ﭨُﻮﭦ ﭘﮍﺗﯽ ﮨﮯ ﺗﻮ ﭼُﭗ ﭼﺎﭖ ﺑﺮﺩﺍﺷﺖ ﮐﺮ ﻟﯿﺘﺎ ﮨﮯ۔...
Life is like a coin, Pleasure and pain are...
9:33 PM
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Life is like a coin, Pleasure and pain are the two sides, Only one side is visible at times, But remember other side is also waiting for its turn...
aapko kitne saalo ka experience hai ?
2:15 AM
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Interviewer - aapko kitne saalo ka experience hai ? ? ? ? ? ? Santa - sir, maine kabhi saalo ko try nahi kiya, lekin mujhe 2 saaliyo ka experience hai....
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
The most romantic story is not Romeo and Juliet who died together, but grandpa and grandma who grew old together.
8:23 PM
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The most romantic story is not Romeo and Juliet who died together, but grandpa and grandma who grew old together....
You Haven't Lost Your SMILE At All,
2:33 AM
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You Haven't Lost Your SMILE At All, It's Right Under Your Nose. You Just Forgot It Was There. . . S M I L E . . . ^_- Have A Blessed D...
Monday, December 16, 2013
Never judge people from the outside, for there might be a volcano ready to erupt on the inside.
10:55 PM
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Never judge people from the outside, for there might be a volcano ready to erupt on the insid...
"Right is still right, even if no one is doing it. And wrong is still wrong, even if everyone is doing it."
7:49 PM
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"Right is still right, even if no one is doing it. And wrong is still wrong, even if everyone is doing it."
- Donna Johns...
ایک سردار جی ڈاکٹر کے پاس آئے اور کہا:
4:40 AM
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ایک سردار جی ڈاکٹر کے پاس آئےاور کہا:ڈاکٹر: مجھے ایک عجیب بیماری ہوگئی ہےمیں روز خواب میں گدھوں کا فٹ بال میچ دیکھتا ہوںڈاکٹر نے انکو دوائی لکھ کر دیدی۔سردار: ڈاکٹر صاحب یہ دوائی میں کل سے شروع کرونگا؟ڈاکٹر: آج سے کیوں نہیں شروع کر رہے؟سردار: وہ اصل میں آج انکا فائنل میچ ہے ن...
Sunday, December 15, 2013
بتاؤ کراچی کی وہ کونسی چورنگی ہےجس کا نام سنتے ہی بیوی
7:58 PM
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شوہر بیوی سے : بتاؤ کراچی کی وہ کونسی چورنگی ہےجس کا نام سنتے ہی بیوی یاد آجاتی ہے؟ بیوی : پتا نہیں ۔ شوہر : "ناگن چورنگی" بیوی شوہر سے : بتاؤ کراچی کا وہ کونسا روڈ ہےجس کا نام سنتے ہی شوہر یاد آجاتا ہے؟ شوہر : پتا نہیں ۔ بیوی : "بندر روڈ"...
If u can touch her heart without touching her, then u can melt her heart just by saying her name
7:54 PM
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If u can touch her heart without touching her, then u can melt her heart just by saying her name....
There's a bus with 7 girls (different version)
7:44 PM
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LATE NIGHT RIDDLE: (Slightly different) There's a bus with 7 girls, Each girl has 7 bags, In each bags, there are 7 big cats, each big cats has 7 little cats and each cat has 4 legs. How many legs does the The bus have???
Answer:
Bus got wheels, not legs....
There's a bus with 7 girls...
7:43 PM
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LATE NIGHT RIDDLE: There's a bus with 7 girls, Each girl has 7 bags, In each bags, there are 7 big cats, each big cats has 7 little cats and each cat has 4 legs. How many legs are present in The bus???
Answer:
Each bag = (1cat+7kittens)x4= 32 legsOne girl has 7 bags so 7x32=224Seven girls have 7 bags so224x7=1568Seven girls 2 legs each so1568+(7x2)=1582Driver has 2 legs 1582+2= 15...
ﺷﺎﺩﯼ ﺷﺪﮦ ﺯﻧﺪﮔﯽ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺳﻨﺎﺋﯽ
9:39 AM
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ﺷﺎﺩﯼ ﺷﺪﮦ ﺯﻧﺪﮔﯽ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺳﻨﺎﺋﯽ ﺩﯾﻨﮯ ﻭﺍﻟﯽ ﺧﻮﻓﻨﺎﮎ ﺍٓﻭﺍﺯﯾﮟ ﺍﭨﮭﯿﮟ ۔۔ ﺑﭽﻮﮞ ﮐﻮ ﺍﺳﮑﻮﻝ ﭼﮭﻮﮌ ﮐﺮ ﺍٓﺋﯿﮟ !! ﮐﯿﺎ ﮬﺮ ﻭﻗﺖ ﮐﻤﭙﯿﻮﭨﺮ ﭘﮧ ﻟﮕﮯ ﺭﮬﺘﮯ ﮬﯿﮟ ، ﺟﺎﺋﯿﮟ ﺑﺎﺯﺍﺭ ﺳﮯ ﺩﮨﯽ ، ﭘﻮﺩﯾﻨﮧ ، ﺍٓﻟﻮ ﺍﻭﺭ ﭨﻤﺎﭨﺮ ﻻﮐﺮ ﺩﯾﮟ !! ﻣﻮﺑﺎﺋﻞ ﮐﺎﺭﮈ ﺧﺘﻢ ﮬﻮﮔﯿﺎ ﮬﮯ ، ﭘﻠﯿﺰ ﻻﺩﯾﮟ ! ﺷﺎﺩﯼ ﺳﮯ ﭘﯿﻠﮯ ﻣﯿﺮﮮ ﺗﻮ ﮔﺎﮌﯾﻮﮞ ﻭﺍﻟﮯ ﺭﺷﺘﮯ ﺁﺗﮯ ﺗﮭﮯ ﻣﯿﺮﯼ ﺗﻮ ﻗﺴﻤﺖ ﺧﺮﺍﺏ ﺟﻮ ﺁﭖ ﮐﮯ ﻣﺘﮭﮯ ﻟﮕﯽ ! ﻣﯿﮟ ﺍٓﺝ ﺭﻭﭨﯽ ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ﭘﮑﺎ ﺭﮬﯽ ، ﺗﻨﺪﻭﺭ ﺳﮯ ﻟﮯ ﺍٓﺋﯿﮟ ! ﺩﻭﺳﺮﯼ ﮐﺮﻧﯽ ﮬﮯ ﺷﻮﻕ ﺳﮯ ﮐﺮﯾﮟ ﻟﯿﮑﻦ ﻣﺠﮭﮯ ﭼﮭﻮﮌﻧﺎ ﮬﻮﮔﺎ ﭘﮭﺮ ! ﯾﮧ ﻭﮨﺎﮞ ﮐﯿﺎ ﺩﯾﮑﮫ ﺭﮬﮯ ﮬﯿﮟ ؟ ﺑﮩﺖ ﭘﺴﻨﺪ ﺍٓﮔﺌﯽ ﮬﮯ ﮐﯿﺎ ؟ ﺭﺍﺕ ﺁﻓﺲ ﻣﯿﮟ ﮨﯽ ﺳﻮﺟﺎﻧﺎ ﮔﮭﺮ ﺁﻧﮯ ﮐﯽ ﺿﺮﻭﺭﺕ ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ! ﮬﯿﻠﻮ ! ۔۔۔۔ ﺍﯾﮏ ﮬﻔﺘﮧ ﭘﻮﺭﺍ ﮬﻮﮔﯿﺎ ۔۔۔۔ ﺍٓﺝ ﻣﺠﮭﮯ...
"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."
9:36 AM
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"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."- Winston Churchi...
Friday, December 13, 2013
Woman was made from the rib of man. She was...
7:29 AM
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Woman was made from the rib of man. She was not created from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be stepped upon. She was made from his side to be close to him, from beneath his arm to be protected by him, near his heart to be loved by hi...
Thursday, December 12, 2013
$100,000 wrist watch and $10 both tells you the...
7:31 PM
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$100,000 wrist watch and $10 both tells you the time
Only difference one tells you how good your time is and other tells how bad it ...
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant...
6:44 PM
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Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant a lot has
changed......
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My name, mobile number, living address, et...
Monday, December 9, 2013
Saturday, December 7, 2013
Height of MISUNDERSTANDING..!!
11:18 AM
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Height of MISUNDERSTANDING..!! Someone placed a bomb Everyone started shouting: "Aunty bomb hai" "Aunty bomb hai" She smiled & said : "Nahi re paglon, ab Pehle jaisi baat kahan....
Friday, December 6, 2013
A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a...
9:15 PM
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A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.
"Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000,
you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the
community in some way?" The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several...
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess...
8:55 PM
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An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your...
A kid was beaten by his
8:38 PM
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A kid was beaten by his mom. . . . . Dad came home and asked: "What happened son?" . . . . Kid said: "Can't adjust with your wife anymore, . . . I need my own...!" :...
Ak larki ki shadi thi,sarey mehman...
8:03 PM
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Ak larki ki shadi thi,sarey mehman aa chukey they..baraat ka intezar tha.. raat ka 1 baj gaya,barat nhi aai,mehaman janey lgy, 2 baj gaya larki ki maa sadmey se be hosh hogai, 3 baj gaey larki k baap ko dil ka dora parr gaya..aakhir 4 bjey ak aadmi bhagta hoa shadi waley tent m dakhil hoa aur tez awaz m chillaya "mubarak ho,dulhey ki car ko CNG mil gai...
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as...
5:36 PM
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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood.
She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?"
The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage.
The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all...
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Wife: Agr Me Pakistan Ki Sb Sy Bari...
7:31 PM
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Wife: Agr Me Pakistan Ki Sb Sy Bari Choti K2 Pr Charhny Main Kamyab Ho Jaon, To Ap Mujhy Kia Dain Gy?
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Husband: Halka Sa Dhakaa...
Tears may erase the pain. Time may erase the
9:02 AM
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Tears may erase the pain. Time may erase the past. But only smile &
forgiveness can make u a better person & take u to the best perso...
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
ایک سکول میں نرسری کی نئی ٹیچر
4:46 AM
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ایک سکول میں نرسری کی نئی ٹیچر اپنی کلاس کے بچوں کے جوتے
پہنا رہی تھی، بیس بچوں کو جوتے پہنانے کے بعد جھک جھک کر اس کی کمر میں
درد ہونے لگا، بیسواں بچہ شرمیلا اور خاموش طبیعت کا تھا، جب ٹیچر اسے بھی
جوتے پہنا چکی تو بچہ بڑے سکون سے بولا۔ ” یہ میرے جوتے نہیں ہیں”
ٹیچر کا دل چاہا کہ وہ رو دے مگر خود پر قابو پا کر بچے کے جوتے اتارنے
لگی۔ جوتے اتار کر کمر سیدھی کی ہی تھی کہ بچہ بڑے سکون سے بولا: ” یہ جوتے میرے بھائی کے ہیں مگر امی نے کہا تھا کہ آج تم یہی پہن کر چلے جاؤ...
Monday, December 2, 2013
There is no difference between govt. and engineering ...
7:56 PM
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There is no difference between govt. and engineering students. Both waste 4-5 years doing nothing and then in the end they try to impress people to choose th...
I prefer not to think before I speak. I like being just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.
5:31 AM
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I prefer not to think before I speak. I like being just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mout...
Sunday, December 1, 2013
Most of the girls don't like to...
9:38 PM
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Most of the girls don't like to helpUnknown Boys-...But ... ......All boys r always there to help AnyUnknown Girl..Moral: Boys are very kind than girls....
A policeman searched me last night in a nightclub and caught...
7:28 PM
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A policeman searched me last night in a nightclub and caught me in
possession of class A drugs. "it's not my fault!" I protested "every
time I flush them down the toilet they magically re-appear in my
pocket." the policeman looked at me in disgust and said "do you really
expect me to believe that?" so I said "I can prove it to you if you
want." the policeman laughed and said "go on then" so he handed me the
drugs and I flushed them down the toilet. then the policeman said "right
then, now show me your pockets" I said "what for?" the policeman...
A boss was complaining in a staff meeting...
10:40 AM
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A boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.
Later that morning he went to a local sign shop and bought a small sign that read, "I'm the Boss".
He then taped it to his office door.
Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said.
"Your wife called, she wants her sign back...
Call Summary
4:56 AM
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Call summary:
Boy to boy!
00:00:59
Boy to mom!
00:00:50
Boy to dad!
00:00:30
Boy to girl!
01:23:59
Girl to girl!
05:29:59
Girl to boy!
miss call
Wife to Husband:
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. Not Responding :...
Friday, November 29, 2013
I Always Wanted To Be...
6:54 PM
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I Always Wanted To Be Punctual, When I Became Punctual...I Realized That Punctuality Is The
Art Of Waiting For Others....
Monday, November 25, 2013
Setting a new password..
7:12 PM
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Setting a new password.... LOL!! So true! "You must enter a password to proceed." -roses "Sorry, too few characters." -pretty roses "Sorry, you must use at least one numerical character." -1 pretty rose "Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces." -1prettyrose "Sorry, you must use at least 10 different characters." -1fuckingprettyrose "Sorry, you must use at least one upper case character." -1FUCKINGprettyrose "Sorry, you cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively." -1FuckingPrettyRose "Sorry, you must use no fewer than...
Beshak mushkil waqt bata kar nahi...
5:54 PM
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Beshak mushkil waqt bata kar nahi ata, magar sikha kar or samjha kar boht Kuch jata hai....
A wealthy lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men
5:53 PM
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A wealthy lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?" "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass." "Well then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you," the lawyer said. "But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree." "Bring them along," the lawyer replied.
Turning to the other poor man he stated,...
Sunday, November 24, 2013
Friday, November 22, 2013
خزاں کا موسم تھا۔ ایک ریڈ انڈین قبیلے کے لوگوں نے اپنے نئے سردار سے
7:29 PM
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خزاں
کا موسم تھا۔ ایک ریڈ انڈین قبیلے کے لوگوں نے اپنے نئے سردار سے پوچھا کہ
موسم سرما اس مرتبہ شدید ہو گا یا پھر اس دفعہ سردی کم پڑے گی۔ اب کیونکہ
وہ ایک جدید زمانے کا ریڈ انڈین سردار تھا اس لیے اس کو یہ ملکہ حاصل نہ
تھا کہ قبل از وقت آنے والے موسم کا اندازہ کر سکے۔ تاہم “سیف سائڈ” پر
رہتے ہوئے اس نے اپنے قبیلے کے لوگوں کو یہی کہا کہ اس مرتبہ شدید سردی
پڑنے کا امکان ہے لہذا لازم ہے کہ وہ لوگ سخت موسم کا مقابلہ کرنے کے لیے
ابھی سے کافی مقدار میں لکڑی اکٹھی کرنا شروع کر دیں۔ اب چونکہ وہ
سردار ایک سمجھ دار آدمی تھا سو کچھ دنوں بعد اس کو...
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Biwi: Suna hay Jannat may biwi ko shohar kay saath nahi rehnay daeN gay.
4:03 AM
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Biwi: Suna hay Jannat may biwi ko shohar kay saath nahi rehnay daeN gay.Husband: Theek suna hay..Biwi: Aisa KioNHusband: "PAGLI" issi liyeh to ussay jannat kehtay hae...
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Kanjoos Doctor apne betay sey
12:17 AM
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Kanjoos Doctor apne betay sey: Mai chahta hun k tum b Doctor bano. Beta: Magr kyun dady? Doctor: Takay mera white coat tumharay kaam aay...
Monday, November 18, 2013
دلہن عروسی جوڑے میں بیٹھی تھی کہ دولہا آیا اور
11:24 PM
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دلہن عروسی جوڑے میں بیٹھی تھی کہ دولہا آیا اور کہنے لگا" مجھے اس دن کا کافی عرصے سے انتظار تھا "۔دلہن نے جواب دیا " اس وقت دن نہیں رات ہے" ۔میرا مطلب ہے کہ تمہیں حاصل کرنے کے لیے میں نے کتنے پاپڑ بیلےدولہا نے وضاحت پیش کی ۔" اس کا مطلب ہے تم پاپڑ بیلنے کا کام کرتے ہو لیکن ہمیں تو کچھ اور ہی بتایا گیا تھا دلہن نے کہا ۔" پیاری ! تم سمجھیں نہیں " دولہا نے روہانسا ہو کر کہا ۔" اس سے پہلے تو کسی دولہا نے اپنی دلہن سے ایسی بات نہیں کی ہوگی کہ وہ ناسمجھ ہے" ۔ دلہن بولی ۔دولہا اپنا سر پکڑ کر بیٹھ گیا اور کہنے لگاابا
صحیح کہتے ہیں کہ دلہن گھر سے رخصت...
ایک صاحب کی بیوی بہت اچھا کھانا بناتی تھیں لیکن انہوں نے کبھی
9:32 PM
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ایک صاحب کی بیوی بہت اچھا کھانا بناتی تھیں لیکن انہوں نے کبھی کھانے کی تعریف نہیں کی-بقرعید
کی نماز پڑھنے گئے تو وہاں خوشیاں بانٹنے کا درس دیا جا رہا تھا۔ مولوی
صاحب نے بتایا کہ بیگم کے اچھیے کاموں کی اور کھانے کی تعریف کرنا اور کبھی
کبھار انعام سے نوازنا بہت اچھی بات ہے ۔ اس سے عزت بڑھتی ہے اور محبت میں
اضافہ ہوتا ہے۔ان
صاحب کو ان باتوں کا بہت اثر ہوا۔ گھر آئے تو بیگم نے کھانا پیش کیا۔
انہوں نے روٹی کے ساتھ قورمہ کھانا شروع کیا اور ہر لقمے پر سبحان اللہ،
ماشاءاللہ اور کیا بات ہے کھانےکی، کہنا شروع کر دیا۔ اور کچھ ہی دیر میں
کھانے اور...
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Friday, November 15, 2013
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
"Thank you for flying with us this morning. The weather is....."
9:35 PM
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Co-pilot was welcoming the passengers on the plane shortly after take off.
"Thank you for flying with us this morning. The weather is....."
When suddenly he starts screaming while he is still on the loud speakers.
"Oh my God! OMG!!! OMG!!! This is going to hurt....Its burning"
A ghostly silence reigned, he gets back on the microphone talking to the passengers.
"I sincerely apologise for the incident but the air hostess just dropped a very hot cup of coffee on my lap... you should see my pants from the front"
A passenger replies, "Why don't...
A friend just told me that I am losing my memory...and I said ...
6:28 PM
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A friend just told me that I am losing my memory...and I said my memory is perfect ! Just because I didnt feed the pets it doesnt mean the football match is going to end because of the sinking ship all the way down from the pants and get fried in a pan like pet food ...Silence............And asked him....Sorry ..what were we talking about ...
Bob, walked into a bar and sat down next to a Sardarji.
2:59 AM
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Bob, walked into a bar and sat down next to a Sardarji. The 10 pm news on TVá was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.Sardarji: "Do you think he will jump?"Bob: "I bet he will jump."Sardarji: "Well, I bet he won't."Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "The bet is on!"Just as Sardarji placed his money on the bar, the guy on the ledge jumped off the building, falling to his death.Sardarji was very upset, but willingly handed his $20 bill to Bob, saying,á "Fairáis fair. Here's your money."Bob: "I can't...
Sunday, November 10, 2013
Showing your love used to be...
8:31 PM
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Showing your love used to be buying them flowers or writing a poem. Now it's just looking at them for 5 minutes without checking your phone.... L...
How's my attitude? Call 1-800-BITE ME! Didn't get through? Keep trying. I have a lot of clients
10:08 AM
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How's my attitude? Call 1-800-BITE ME! Didn't get through? Keep trying. I have a lot of clients :...
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
Going to College: late ...
6:43 AM
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Going to College: late Going to a doctors appointment: late Going to a party: late Going to a concert: 8 hours early...
My girlfriend told me that if I bought her one more
5:09 AM
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My girlfriend told me that if I bought her one more stupid gift she would burn it. So I bought her a candle...
Monday, November 4, 2013
3 most innocent faces in d world
8:36 AM
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3 most innocent faces in d world . ' . ' 1-"a sleeping baby." : ; ; ; 2-"udhar mangane wala aadmi" ; ; ; ; 3-"hamare parents ke samne baitha hua apna dost....
A Drop of Lemon Juice Can Spoil Gallons of Milk...
6:04 AM
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A Drop of Lemon Juice Can Spoil Gallons of Milk... Similarly A lil ignorance in self grooming Can Destroy The Beauty of a girl Take Care of Your grooming styles.....
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest and peace so here are some sleeping pills.
2:56 AM
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Doctor: Madam, your husband needs rest and peace so here are some sleeping pills. Wife: When should i give it to him? Doctor: These are for you...
"Do u know biology, psychology, geology and criminology?"
2:46 AM
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A Tourist asked a Boatman:
"Do u know biology, psychology, geology and criminology?"
.
.
The Boatman said no to all the questions.
..
The Tourist then said:"What the hell do u know on the face of this earth?
You will die of Illiteracy!!"
..
After a while the boat started sinking.
So the Boatman asked the Tourist:"
Do u know swimology and escapology from crocodilogy?
.
.
The Tourist said no.
The Boatman replied:"Well u will drownology and crocodilogy will eat ur assology and u will dieology bcos of ur mouthology......
Bitter Truth . "Everyone wants to ..."
12:48 AM
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Bitter Truth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "Everyone wants to park his vehicle in shadow but No one wants to plant a tre...
Friday, November 1, 2013
You have to hurt in order to know. Fall in order to grow...
6:26 AM
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You have to hurt in order to know. Fall in order to grow. Lose in order to gain. Because most of life’s lessons are learned in pain....
Don't worry too much about sugar in the blood Worry about spice on the Tongue & Salt in the heart.
6:24 AM
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Don't worry too much about sugar in the blood Worry about spice on the Tongue & Salt in the hea...
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Sitting with wise people makes you wiser. Sitting with ignorant people makes you
5:28 AM
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Sitting with wise people makes you wiser. Sitting with ignorant people makes you ignorant. Sitting with poor & less fortunate people removes the ego & pride from your heart. - Ibn Al Qay...
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
انسانی ذہن ہمیشہ بطخ کی طرح تیرتا ہے ۔ نیچے اتھاہ گہرائیوں میں جو سیپیاں موتی ہوتے ہیں
7:25 AM
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انسانی ذہن ہمیشہ بطخ کی طرح تیرتا ہے ۔ نیچے اتھاہ گہرائیوں میں جو سیپیاں موتی ہوتے ہیں ، بطخ کو ان کاعلم ہی نہیں ہو پاتا "
بانو قدسیہ مردِ ابری...
پاگل کچھ بھی کر سکتا ہے۔۔۔ !
7:22 AM
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پاگل کچھ بھی کر سکتا ہے۔۔۔ !
ایک بیوی نے اپنے شوہر سے بڑے مان کے ساتھ کہا”
میں مر گئی تو آپ کا کیا بنے گا؟
شوہر نے دکھی ہوتے ہوئے کہا کہ ”میں پاگل ہو جا¶ں گا“۔۔
بیوی نے پھر بڑے مان کے ساتھ پوچھا
”کہیںآپ دوسری شادی تو نہیں کر لیں گے؟
شوہر نے ٹھنڈی آہ بھرتے ہوئے کہا ”
پاگل کچھ بھی کر سکتا ...
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
When she says "we need talk", change your...
7:20 PM
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When she says "we need talk", change your number & move, so she can't break up with you. Then pop up years later and break up with he...
That awkward moment when you realize you're walking in the wrong...
7:17 PM
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That awkward moment when you realize you're walking in the wrong direction, so you hit your pockets pretending you forgot something....
Duniya k 2 intehai Mushkil kaam,
8:59 AM
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Duniya k 2 intehai Mushkil kaam, 1: Apna idea kisi Aur k Zehan me Fit krna, 2: Kisi Aur ka Paisa Apni jeib me Muntaqil krna, Jo Pehle me kamyab hota hai, Usy Teacher kehte hain, Jo dusrey me kamyab hota hy, Usy Buisness Man kehte hain, Aur, Jo Donon me kamyab hota hy Usy... "Biwi" kehte hain...
Kia Aap Ne Kabhi Apni Wife Ki Nazar Se Dunya Ko Dekha He?
8:58 AM
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Kia Aap Ne Kabhi Apni Wife Ki Nazar Se Dunya Ko Dekha He? Nhi. Aek Bar Dekhen To Shayad Aap Ko Pata Chale . .. K . . Duniya Ka Sab Se Perfect Man "Us k Abbu" Dunya Ka sab Se Dukhi Husband "Us ka Bhai" Dunya Ka Sab Se Haseen Larka "Us ka Chota Bhai" Dunya Ka Sab Se Khush Nasib Aadmi "Us ka Behnoi" Dunya ka Sab Se Aqalmand Aadmi "Us ka Mamoo" Aur Dunya Ka Sab Se Selfish Jhutha Kanjoos Aur Bekaar Aadmi . . . Ye B Likhna Pare Ga Kya...
Smile Is The Electricity & Life Is A Battery...
5:12 AM
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Smile Is The Electricity
&
Life Is A Battery. .
Whenever U Smile
The Battery Gets Charged
&
A Beautiful Day Is Activated
.
sO
KeEp
sMiLiÑg
4EvE...
One evening after work, a man drove his secretary home after
4:36 AM
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One evening after work, a man drove his secretary home after she had a little too much to drink at a party. Although nothing happened, he decided not to mention it to his wife.
Later that night, the man and his wife were driving to a movie when he spotted a high-heeled shoe hidden under the passenger seat. Pointing to something out the passenger window to distract his wife, he picked up the shoe and tossed it out of his window.
They arrived at the theater a short time later and were about to get out of the car when his wife asked, "Honey, have...
4:33 AM
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ﺍﯾﮏ ﻋﻮﺭﺕ ﺍﯾﮏ ﮈﯾﻨﭩﻞ ﺳﺮﺟﻦ
ﮐﮯ ﮐﻤﺮﮮ ﻣﯿﮟ ﺩﺍﺧﻞ ﮨﻮﺋﯽ
ﺍﻭﺭ ﻣﺤﺒﺖ ﺳﮯ ﺑﻮﻟﯽ
ﻣﺠﮭﮯ ﺑﮩﺖ ﺟﻠﺪﯼ ﮨﮯ ﮈﺍﮐﭩﺮ
ﺻﺎﺣﺐ، ﺁﭖ ﮐﻮ ﺍﯾﮏ ﺩﺍﻧﺖ
ﺍﺑﮭﯽ ﻧﮑﺎﻟﻨﺎ ﮨﻮ، ﺑﺮﺍﮦِ ﮐﺮﻡ ﺍﭘﻨﯽ
ﻓﯿﺲ ﺑﺘﺎ ﺩﯾﮟ ” ۔
ﮈﺍﮐﭩﺮ ﻧﮯ ﻓﯿﺲ ﺑﺘﺎﺋﯽ ﺗﻮ
ﻋﻮﺭﺕ ﻧﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ “ ﯾﮧ ﺗﻮ ﺑﮩﺖ
ﺯﯾﺎﺩﮦ ﮨﮯ ”
ﮈﺍﮐﭩﺮ ﻧﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ “ ﺍﺱ ﻣﯿﮟ ﻣﯿﺮﯼ
ﻓﯿﺲ ﮐﮯ ﻋﻼﻭﮦ ﺟﻠﺪ ﮐﻮ ﺳﻦ
ﮐﺮﻧﮯ ﻭﺍﻟﯽ ﺍﺩﻭﯾﺎﺕ ﮐﯽ ﻗﯿﻤﺖ
ﺑﮭﯽ ﺷﺎﻣﻞ ﮨﮯ ﺍﻭﺭ ﻭﮦ ﺍﺩﻭﯾﺎﺕ
ﺍﺏ ﺑﮩﺖ ﻣﮩﻨﮕﯽ ﮨﻮﮔﺌﯽ ﮨﯿﮟ
ﻋﻮﺭﺕ ﻧﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ ﺁﭖ ﺍﺩﻭﯾﺎﺕ ﮐﻮ
ﭼﮭﻮﮌﯾﮟ ﺍﻭﺭ ﯾﻮﻧﮩﯽ ﺩﺍﻧﺖ
ﻧﮑﺎﻝ ﺩﯾﮟ ”
ﮈﺍﮐﭩﺮ ﻧﮯ ﺣﯿﺮﺕ ﺳﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ
“ ﺁﭖ ﺟﯿﺴﯽ ﺑﮩﺎﺩﺭ ﻋﻮﺭﺕ ﻣﯿﮟ
ﮐﺒﮭﯽ ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ﺩﯾﮑﮭﯽ ” ۔
ﻋﻮﺭﺕ ﻧﮯ ﮐﮩﺎ ﮐﮧ “ ﺩﺍﻧﺖ ﻣﯿﺮﺍ
ﻧﮩﯿﮟ ﻣﯿﺮﮮ ﺷﻮﮨﺮ ﮐﺎ ﻧﮑﺎﻟﻨﺎ
ﮨﮯ ﻭﮦ ﺑﺎﮨﺮ ﺑﯿﭩﮭﺎ ﮨﻮﺍ ...
I've been trying to figure out how long "forever" is... and by looking at some people's relationships, it's around 3 to 6 weeks.
1:38 AM
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I've been trying to figure out how long "forever" is... and by looking at some people's relationships, it's around 3 to 6 week...
Play to win, but be a good loser. Have a plan for your life, but accept whatever comes your way with grace and gratitude.
1:04 AM
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Play to win, but be a good loser. Have a plan for your life, but accept whatever comes your way with grace and gratitud...
ھر بڑے آدمی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے،جو
1:02 AM
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ھر بڑے آدمی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے،جو ھر دم اس سے آگے آنے کی کوشش کرتی ھے ھر بڑے آدمی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے ، پھر بھی وہ بڑا آدمی بن جاتا ھے ھر بڑے آدمی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے ، جس کی عمر بڑے آدمی کی عمر سے کافی کم ھوتی ھے ھر بڑے آدمی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے، جس کے پیچھے ایک چھوٹا آدمی ھوتا ھے ھر بڑے آدمی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے،،جس سے ھوشیار رھنا بہت ضروری ھے ھر بڑے آدمی کی کامیابی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے ،جو بڑے آدمی کو چھوٹا بنانے کی تگ و دو میں رھتی ھے ھر بڑے آدمی کی کامیابی کے پیچھے ایک عورت ھوتی ھے ، جو اس کے بڑا بن جانے...
Monday, October 28, 2013
If a person laughs too much, even at stupid
12:54 PM
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If a person laughs too much, even at stupid
things, he is lonely deep inside..
>> If a person sleeps a lot, he is sad..
>> If a person speaks less, but speaks fast, he
keeps secrets..
>> If someone can't cry, he is weak..
>> If someone eats in an abnormal manner, he is
tense..
>> If someone cries on little things,he is innocent
& soft-hearted..
>> If someone becomes angry over silly or petty
(small) things, it means he needs love...
Try to understand people more....
Boss : There are 50 bricks on an aeroplane. If you drop 1 outside. How many are left?
2:53 AM
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Boss : There are 50 bricks on an aeroplane. If you drop 1 outside. How many are left? Employee : That's easy, 49. Boss : What are the three steps to put an elephant into a fridge? Employee : Open the fridge. Put the elephant in. Close the fridge Boss : What are the four steps to put a deer into the fridge? Employee : Open the fridge. Take the elephant out. Put the deer in. Close the fridge. Boss : It's lion's birthday, all animals are there except one, why? Employee : Because the deer is in the fridge. Boss : How does an old woman cross a...
A Mehran breaks down on a roadside.
2:50 AM
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A Mehran breaks down on a roadside. A BMW 750 stops to help the driver. "I will tow you to the next service station, but if I drive too fast please flash your lights" They start up slowly but a only a km or so down the line a Porsche speeds past 150km an hour. The BMW driver forgets about Mehran & guns it after the Porsche. Just as all 3 of them tear through a speed trap the cop radios the HQ: "You won't believe I have seen a BMW & a Porsche racing past 170 km an hour with a Mehran behind them flashing its lights to Overta...
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Parents worry about what their sons download and what their daughters upload on the internet.
9:13 PM
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Parents worry about what their sons download and what their daughters upload on the internet...
It is not important that you are beautiful to...
4:57 PM
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It is not important that you are beautiful to someone....
It is beautiful that you are important to someone...
What is a girl friend?
5:48 AM
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What is a girl friend? Addition of problems, subtraction of money, multiplication of enemies & division of friends....
Paul's height is six feet, he's an assistant at a butcher's shop, and wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?
5:38 AM
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Paul's height is six feet, he's an assistant at a butcher's shop, and wears size 9 shoes. What does he weigh?
Answer: Meat...
Our parents believe that studying is so easy just like walking in a park...
5:26 AM
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Our parents believe that studying is so easy just like walking in a park... . . . . . . . . . . . . But only we know that this park is a JURASSIC park with a variety of DINOSAURS ( Teachers ...
Saturday, October 26, 2013
Sardar ka pyar...
10:58 AM
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Larki: Sardar G Aapko Mujh Se Pyar Hai?
Sardar: Han.
Larki:
Lekin Aapko tu Meri Bilkul Prwah Nahi.
Sardar:
Oye Pagal Pyar krny waly kisi ki Parwah Nahi krt...
what is 1227 BC?
3:55 AM
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21st century kids visiting museum, they see a Egyptian mummy on display with a board that says 1227 BC.
Boy 1: what is 1227 BC?
Boy 2: that must be his BBM pin.
*facepal...
Friday, October 25, 2013
If you fail, learn. If you succeed, relish your success. You can only know the sweet taste of victory after the bitter struggles.
8:44 PM
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If you fail, learn. If you succeed, relish your success. You can only know the sweet taste of victory after the bitter struggles....
Thursday, October 24, 2013
"Most of the problems in life are because of two reasons:
8:23 PM
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"Most of the problems in life are because of two reasons: We act without thinking or we keep thinking without acting...
There are two reasons why we don't trust people...
1:22 PM
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There are two reasons why we don't trust people.
FIRST: We don't know them...
SECOND: We know them........
Aap ke name ka 3rd letter aap ko bataega ki aap ko Zindagi mein subse zyada kya milega...
6:52 AM
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Aap ke name ka 3rd letter aap ko bataega ki aap ko Zindagi mein subse zyada kya milega....????
A. Kiss B. Rose C. Missed calls D. Bohat izzat E. Blessing F. Dua G. Mitha H. Money I. Respect J. Khushi K. Doulat L. Perfums M. Mohabbat N. Happiness O. Care P. Friendship Q. Gift R. Lots of love S. Love 4 ever T. Tension U. Tears V. Pain W. Hug X. Flate Y. Chocolate Z. Lo...
We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love...
6:39 AM
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We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alon...
Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight ...
6:37 AM
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"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday."
-John Way...
So many messenger to talk to the same people, it's like buying five remotes for the same TV.
5:52 AM
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So many messenger to talk to the same people, it's like buying five remotes for the same T...
"You can tell the size of the man by the size of...
3:59 AM
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"You can tell the size of the man by the size of the problem that gets him down." Johnny Dani...
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else.
9:30 PM
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One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else...
Million Dollar Truth...
7:06 AM
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Million Dollar Truth. Wife is Cute when she is Mute. and Husband is Honey when he gives Money. So are you Cute or Honey?...
Relatives coming soon. . .
6:19 AM
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Relatives coming soon. . . . . . . . . . . . . Mum is cleaning the house, and I'm cleaning the browser history....
1-admi ne Fish pakri jab ghar aaya to dekha Na gas...
4:30 AM
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1-admi ne Fish pakri
jab ghar aaya to dekha
Na gas
Na ata
Na bijli
Na oil
admi wapis Fish ko darya me phenk aaya
Fish upar aai or zor se chilai.
JIYE Sharee...
Profesr: What Is Atention Deficit Hyperactiv Disordr?
4:28 AM
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Profesr: What Is Atention Deficit Hyperactiv Disordr?
Student: Jimba Lomba Bomba Hudumba!!
Prof: Ye Kya Tha?
Student: Pehly aap Btao Vo Kya Tha...!...
Police: Darwaza kholo Tumhari biwi truck k neechy aa...
4:26 AM
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Police: Darwaza kholo Tumhari biwi truck k neechy aa kar paper ban gayi hai, . . . . . Sardar: To darwaza kholny ki kya zarurat hai? Neechy se hi sarka dO ...
I had an x-ray d0ne t0day & they f0und y0u in my heart. The d0ct0r said if they to0k y0u 0ut i w0uld die bec0z i c0uld n0t live wid0ut such a ...
4:25 AM
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I had an x-ray d0ne t0day & they f0und y0u in my heart. The d0ct0r said if they to0k y0u 0ut i w0uld die bec0z i c0uld n0t live wid0ut such a l0ving pers0n.
Send this sms t0 every0ne y0u d0n't wanna l0se in 2014 & wh0 made y0u smile this year...
All flowers don't represent love, But Rose...
4:19 AM
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All flowers don't represent love,
But
Rose did it
Al birds can't speak
But
Parrot did it
Al dogs can't lead countries
But
He did it
Han Han Wohi ...
Who is "me" 1 .Busy...
4:17 AM
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Who is "me"
1 .Busy person.
2 .SweetHeart.
3 .Gud looking.
4 .True friend.
5 .Cool boy.
6 .Best friend.
7 .Cute & shy.
8 .Emotional.
9 .Trusty.
10.your life.
11.Smart boy.
12.Sensitive.
Reply mus...
Ufone pesh krta hai 12 Aaney package apney un Jazz sarfeen k lye jnho ne 1st Jan 2011 se apni Telenor SIM istimal nhi ki...
4:16 AM
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Ufone pesh krta hai 12 Aaney package apney un Jazz sarfeen k lye jnho ne 1st Jan 2011 se apni Telenor SIM istimal nhi ki,
so Abi Warid ka Rs 100 ka crd chrge kren aur Zong se sb keh dein
Mazeed malumat k liye apne PTCL se dial karn
0900-78601
Qk jahan khwab waha HBL
"Load sheding ne pagal bna di...
“The Earth is Art, The Photographer is only a Witness ”
2:13 AM
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“The Earth is Art, The Photographer is only a Witness ” ― Yann Arthus-Bertrand, Earth from Abo...
There are two types of people in the world:
2:12 AM
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There are two types of people in the world: 1. People who understand and appreciate sarcasm. 2. Idiot...
Every time my parents tell me a story from when they were kids, I imagine it in black and white.
1:07 AM
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Every time my parents tell me a story from when they were kids, I imagine it in black and whit...
That annoying moment when you're trying to end a conversation but the other person won't stop talking... #pleaseshutup
12:40 AM
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That annoying moment when you're trying to end a conversation but the other person won't stop talking... #pleaseshut...
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
batameezi is...
6:41 AM
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batameezi is . . . . . . . . . . . . . pass ho k bhi treat na daina 1st year walon treat??...
When I get a headache, I take 2 to 3 aspirins and keep away from children......just like the bottle says to...
5:44 AM
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When I get a headache, I take 2 to 3 aspirins and keep away from children......just like the bottle says to....
Monday, October 21, 2013
Sitting on the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car...
8:30 PM
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Sitting on the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car puttering along at 22 M.P.H. He thinks to himself, that car is just as dangerous as a speeder. So, he turns his lights on and pulls the car over. Approaching the car, he notices there are 5 old ladies, two at the front and 3 at the back, wide eyed and looking like ghosts. The driver obviously confused said,"Officer, I don't understand, I wasn't doing over the speed limit!, What seems to be the problem?" "Ma'am," the officer said, "you should know that driving slower...
A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows public opinions. - Chinese Proverb
7:59 PM
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A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows public opinions. - Chinese Prove...
Alhumdulilah for the good. Alhumdulilah for the bad. InshaAllah for the best that is yet to come.
4:32 PM
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Alhumdulilah for the good. Alhumdulilah for the bad. InshaAllah for the best that is yet to com...
I don’t understand how my room gets so messy when I literally sit in one spot with my computer all day.
8:20 AM
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I don’t understand how my room gets so messy when I literally sit in one spot with my computer all day....
Next generation will say- Twinkle twinkle little cigar, i just went to...
7:53 AM
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Next generation will say- Twinkle twinkle little cigar, i just went to ROYAL BAR whiskey rates are up so high so drink bear wid chicken fr...
A cowboy rode to an inn on Friday. He stayed two nights and left on Friday. How could that be?
6:24 AM
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A cowboy rode to an inn on Friday. He stayed two nights and left on Friday. How could that be?
Answer: His horse name was Friday. ...
Which mobile brand are you using??
12:21 AM
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Which mobile brand are you using?? Copy ur brand on the comment box and see the magic but make sure you remove the + sign and no gap like [[your brand name]] 1. [+[Nokia]] 2. [+[LG]] 3. [+[Samsung]] 4. [+[Motorola]] 5. [+[HTC]] 6. [+[Micromax]] 7. [+[Blackberry]] 8. [+[China]]
(Only for Facebook)...
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Make sure you never, never argue at night. You just lose a good night's sleep, and you can't settle anything until morning anyway.
11:05 PM
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Make sure you never, never argue at night. You just lose a good night's sleep, and you can't settle anything until morning anywa...
That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto correct is like., "I've got nothing man "
4:09 AM
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That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto correct is like., "I've got nothing man "...
Newton's 1st law of love
3:33 AM
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Newton's 1st law of love . . . . . . Love can neither be created nor can be destroyed . . . . . . . . It can be only transferred from . . . Ex to Next !...
Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?
3:31 AM
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Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia? The Mafia wants either or money or life... The wives want both...
Saturday, October 19, 2013
"The truth is, you don't break a bad habit; you replace it with a good one." -Denis Waitley
8:27 AM
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"The truth is, you don't break a bad habit; you replace it with a good one."
- Denis Waitl...
Received a call from a recruitment consultant.
4:59 AM
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Received a call from a recruitment consultant. She said " Sir I have two openings for you". I said " Yes I know". After a long silence, she hung up the phone..!...
Before bed: I dont wanna go to bed! In bed: I dont wanna get up! Before shower: I dont wanna take a shower! In shower: I dont wanna get out.
4:56 AM
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Before bed: I dont wanna go to bed! In bed: I dont wanna get up! Before shower: I dont wanna take a shower! In shower: I dont wanna get ou...
I think it's funny that people who treat you like shit get offended when you finally do the same to them.
3:46 AM
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I think it's funny that people who treat you like shit get offended when you finally do the same to the...
“The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth."
3:30 AM
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“The miracle is not to fly in the air,
or to walk on the water,
but to walk on the earth...
If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I'd just laugh and search with them.
2:16 AM
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If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I'd just laugh and search with the...
5 janwaron k naam btao jo pani main rehty hn...
2:15 AM
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Teacher to sardar: 5 janwaron k naam btao jo pani main rehty hn... … … … sardar: ''fish'' … … … … teacher: good good aur... … … … … sardar: FISH di maa, piyo,ty pan ty praa!...
Jasvinders' girlfriend told him to bring PROTECTION next time they...
1:10 AM
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Jasvinders' girlfriend told him to bring PROTECTION next time they go on a date. Jasvinder brought 3 Brothers, 25 Friends, & 12 Cousins with hockey sticks.....
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.
1:07 AM
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Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reaso...
Girls to another girl in mall:-
12:45 AM
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Girls to another girl in mall:- "Waah! Kya mall hai yaar!" . . . . . guys in mall:- "Waah! Kya maal hai yaar!"...
Na Rakhna , Mery chahne walo Ko Itna Masroof
12:41 AM
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Na Rakhna , Mery chahne walo Ko Itna Masroof
:=AY KHUDA=:
Aisa Na Ho K Mujhe dafna diya Jay Or Unhain Khbr Tk Na Ho......
لڑکا: “میں تمھیں بنا چھوئے گلے لگا سکتا ہوں؟”
12:03 AM
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لڑکا: “میں تمھیں بنا چھوئے گلے لگا سکتا ہوں؟” لڑکی: “یہ ناممکن ہے۔” لڑکا: “لگی شرط پیپسی کی؟” لڑکی: “ٹھیک ہے۔” لڑکے نے جلدی سے آگے بڑھ کر لڑکی کو گلے لگا لیا۔لڑکی چلائی تم نے مجھے چھوا! لڑکا (ہنستے ہوئے) : “ہاں تو رو کیوں رہی ہے۔ لا رہا ہوں نا پیپسی۔...
Friday, October 18, 2013
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish...
11:43 PM
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My
therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what
I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of Lays and a Snicker bar. I
feel better already...
Heart
11:35 PM
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…….♥#########♥ …..♥#############♥ …♥###############♥ ..♥#################♥………………♥###♥ ..♥##################♥……….♥#########♥ ….♥#################♥……♥#############♥ …….♥################♥..♥###############♥ ………♥################♥################♥ ………..♥###############################♥ …………..♥############################♥ …………….♥#########################♥ ………………♥######################♥ ………………..♥###################♥ ………………….♥#################♥ ……………………♥##############♥ ………………………♥###########♥ ………………………..♥#########♥ ………………………….♥#######♥ ……………………………♥#####♥...
Nothing says you are ugly like Facebook asking ''Are you sure you want to make this your profile picture?
10:50 PM
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Nothing says you are ugly like Facebook asking ''Are you sure you want to make this your profile picture?...
Study - (verb) The act of texting, eating and watching TV with an open textbook nearby. ;)
10:33 PM
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Study - (verb) The act of texting, eating and watching TV with an open textbook nearby. ...
10:12 PM
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People who sleep less tend to crave junk food - People who oversleep tend to crave more slee...
I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, “Well, that’s not going to happen.”
10:11 PM
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I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, “Well, that’s not going to happen...
Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation.
10:10 PM
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Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation. Your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you ar...
Good songs always end quickly. Smile always fades away...
10:09 PM
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Good songs always end quickly. Smile always fades away. Happiness is always short lived. WHY? Why can't this good feeling last? I jus want to close my eyes and remain in my imagination, because there things are always warm and cos...
Kaiynat K Saary Rung
10:04 PM
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Kaiynat K Saary Rung Runoun K Sare Phol Pholon Ki Sari Khushbu Khushbu K Sare Lamhe Aur In Lamho Se Bharpoor Zindagi Ki Dua Ap Ki Salgirah Pe Ap Ke Naam Happy Birthday...
The HR interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test.
12:25 PM
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The HR interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test. "You are employed" he said. "Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the forms to fill in as well as when you may start". The man replied "But I don't have a computer, neither an email." "I'm sorry", said the HR manager, "If you don't have an email, that means u do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job."
The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only $10
in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket & buy a 10Kg tomato...
Sometimes when I play a game...
10:33 AM
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Sometimes when I play a game, the screen goes black and I see my own reflection on the laptop screen, and wonder what I'm doing with my life..... . . . . . . . . . . and then next Level begin...
Thinking looks most productive when traveling n most useless in toilet. Unfortunately u cant write at either place.
10:30 AM
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Thinking looks most productive when traveling n most useless in toilet. Unfortunately u cant write at either place...
Life is like a book, some chapters are happy some sad and some exciting, But ...
10:28 AM
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Life is like a book, some chapters are happy some sad and some exciting, But if you never turn the page you will never know what life has in store.....
"The proverb warns that 'you should not bite the hand that feeds you.' But may be you should, if it prevents you from feeding yourself"
7:00 AM
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The proverb warns that 'you should not bite the hand that feeds you.' But may be you should, if it prevents you from feeding yourse...
Dating co-worker is good or bad?
6:32 AM
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Friend: Dating co-worker is good or bad?
Me: Bad! My wife really frowns upon me dating my coworkers...
Your name's 2nd Alphabet is ....
5:34 AM
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Your name's 2nd Alphabet is ....
A = Romantic
B = Proud
C = Innocent
D = Lovable
E = Good but Hurtful
F = Compassionate
G-- Logical Minded
H = Leadership Potential
I = Helpful
J = Free-Spirited
K = Irritating
L = Funny
M = Emotional
N = Sensible
O = Supportive
P = Awesome
Q = Unpredictable
R = Practical
S = Loving
T = Fake
U = Sensitive
V = Genius
W = Calm
X = Easy-Going
Y = Intelligent
Z = Energetic....
Staying in a bad relationship is like holding a cactus...the tighter you hold the more it hurts!
5:28 AM
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Staying in a bad relationship is like holding a cactus...the tighter you hold the more it hurt...
Why Don”t U Had A Boyfriend Yet?
3:07 AM
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Sweet Flirt: Boy: Why Don”t U Had A Boyfriend Yet? Girl: Am Not Allowed To Have A Boyfriend, Why Don”t U Have A Girlfriend..? Boy: Cuz U R Not Allowed To Have A Boyfriend Y...
Thursday, October 17, 2013
If a drop of water falls in a lake, it has no identity...
11:49 PM
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If a drop of water falls in a lake, it has no identity... but if it falls on a leaf, it shines like a pearl. Therefore in life, always choose the best place to shin...
tmhara dost or gf kashti me...
9:41 PM
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Teacher : Agar tmhara dost or gf kashti me doob rahe ho to tum kise bachaoge ? Student : Marne do dono ko..! Teacher : kyu.? . . . Student : Saale dono 1 sath 1 kasti mein kar kya rhe the.....
God opens millions of flowers without forcing the buds, it reminds us not to force anything for things happen in the right time.
9:40 PM
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God
opens millions of flowers without forcing the buds, it reminds us not
to force anything for things happen in the right time. ...
Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires ...
9:36 PM
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“Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.”- Gail Deve...
Teacher : What kind of wife would you like Johnny?
8:02 PM
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One day a teacher was talking about marriage in class...Teacher : What kind of wife would you like Johnny?Johnny : I would want a wife like the moon...Teacher : Wow !! what a choice...do you want her to be cool & calm like the moon?Johnny : No, no...Teacher: oh so u want her to be round and white? 🌕Johny: No, no...Teacher: Oh, so u want her to be fair and beautiful like d moon? 🌝Johny: No, no...I want her to arrive at night and disappear in the morning :&l...
The path to success...
9:36 AM
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The path to... ╭⇠⇠⇠╯ ╰⇢⇢⇢╮ ╭⇠⇠⇠╯ ╰⇢⇢⇢╮ ╭⇠⇠⇠╯ ╰⇢⇢⇢╮ ╭⇠⇠⇠╯ ╰⇢⇢⇢╮ ╭⇠⇠⇠╯ ╰⇢⇢⇢╮ ╭⇠⇠⇠╯ ╰⇢ SUCCESS Isn't always straight...
You don't have to be a student of the arts to be an artist, The real talent comes from passion.
8:11 AM
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You don't have to be a student of the arts to be an artist, The real talent comes from passion....
We're a part of a generation which considers completing a TV Series as an achievement.
7:44 AM
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We're a part of a generation which considers completing a TV Series as an achievement. :...
How are you going to make me believe that the chair in front of you is invisible?
7:38 AM
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A psychology professor asked his students just one question for their final exams: How are you going to make me believe that the chair in front of you is invisible? It took all students an hour to finish the answer, excpt a lazy student who took only 5 seconds. Eventually, the lazy student got the highest score. His answer was: "WHICH CHAIR???" Life is Simple. Keep it Simple....
zinda raha to sub ka sath nibhaounga doston ...
6:22 AM
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zinda raha to sub ka sath nibhaounga doston
bhool jaon to samjh lena k, aik shehzadi urra le gai shehzady ko ...
A Sailor Was Stuck In An Island Where He Was The Only Survivor!
6:21 AM
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A Sailor Was Stuck In An Island Where He Was The Only Survivor!
He Made A Hut For His Shelter.
Day And Night,
He Was Praying And Waiting For Someone To Rescue Him But Nobody Came!
He Stored Food In The Hut For His Survival But One Day!
The Hut Got Burnt To Ashes And Nothing Was Left Of It!
He Was So Angry! He Said,
"ALLAH, Why Have You Done This To Me?"
The Next Morning, Rescuers Came.
He Asked,
"How Did You know That I Was Here?
They Replied,
"We Saw A Smoke Signal!"
Trust ALLAH When Misfortune Happens,
Allah's Plans Are Always Greater Than...
Wo hamain bewafa kehta hai to kehta rahy....
6:18 AM
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Wo hamain bewafa kehta hai to kehta rahy....
<('.') ammi khti han
/"/> jo kehta hai
/"/ wo khud hi hota hai......
Friends & Medicines play the ...
6:17 AM
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Friends & Medicines play the same role in our life
Both take care of us in our pains
But the difference is,
Friends don't have an Expiry Date....
Must Read: FAHASH or GANDAY Jokes ya Msgs fwd na kren bal_k Delete krden Q k Quran k mutabiq: "Be shak Wo log jo MOMINO me...
6:16 AM
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Must Read:
FAHASH or GANDAY Jokes ya Msgs fwd na kren bal_k
Delete krden
Q k Quran k mutabiq:
"Be shak Wo log jo MOMINO me be-hayai phelana chahty hen un k lye dunya Or aakhirat me dard-nak Azaab hai"
(surat noor-19)
Kya hm Allah ka Dardnaak Azaab brdaasht kr sktay hen??
Dosto ko b smjhaen.
JzakALLA...
Khuda Aap k Sare Ghum Rait Pr Likh De...
6:15 AM
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Khuda Aap k Sare Ghum Rait Pr Likh De Ta'ke Hwa Se He Mit Jayen
OR
Khshyan Pthar Pr Likh De Ta'ke Hwa Tu Kya Barish B Na Mta Sky
Amee...
Apna iman bachao aur yaad rakho 1.Ksi Islami Mahinay ki mubarkbad se Jannat wajib nhi hoti ...
6:14 AM
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Apna iman bachao aur yaad rakho
1.Ksi Islami Mahinay ki mubarkbad se Jannat wajib nhi hoti
2.Allah k nam ya koi wazifa forwrd krne se KhushKhbri ya Aafat nhi ati
3.Nabi(S.A.W.W)ki Qasam de k msg forwrd krne ko kehna Haram he
4.Nabi (S.A.W.W) or BB ZAINAB k khwab me ane wale msgs forwrd na kren
5.koi b qurani ayat ya hadis pak ya ksi sahabi ka qoul confirmation k bghair forwrd na kren
Plz forwrd this important msg to others
BHEJO NA BHEJO PR plz is py amal zaror krn...
1 Larka or Larki ek dusre se boht pyaar karte thay
3:38 AM
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"Real story" "Kya pyaar kerna itna bara gunah hai? 1 Larka or Larki ek dusre se boht pyaar karte thay... Larki k baap ko pata chal gaya. wo guhsse pe qabu na rakh saka or Larki se kaha "Tujhe mein aaj wo saza dunga k ishq karne walon k Liye nishan'e ibrat hoga. Usne Larki ko zameen per Lita k bijli se chalne wali aari uski gardan k paas ker k abhi chalai he thi k Achanak
LIGHT chali gayi Or Larki ne naara lagaya G.A Sharee...