Do you guys call your wives 'Honey' in your native language?

American: Do you guys call your wives 'Honey' in your native language?

Indian: no, we call them 'bee-bee' - they sting twice as hard as the honey bee!
😝🐝😝

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A Double Bedroom, please.

Man checks in a hotel...
A Double Bedroom, please.
Hotel Manager: But, Sir you are alone..!
Man: Yes, but I am a Married Man and I wish to "ENJOY SILENCE" from the other side of the BED. 😂😂😂

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How can you expect me to remember your birthday when u never...

Wife (angrily) 😡: I don't believe this..
You forgot my birthday again??
How can you do this..
     
Husband: How can you expect me to remember your birthday when u never look older..!

Wife (clears her throat & smiles)☺☺ : Jaanu, Sacchi..

😛Husband in his mind- "saala sahi time pe dialogue aa gaya..warna khatam tha aaj 😜😜 !!".

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Please pray for my neighbour's wife...

Please pray for my neighbour's wife ... We are on our way to the hospital now. She swallowed a Memory Card (32GB) and she is singing all the songs on it. We don't know what will happen when she gets to the videos folder 😀😜😜😜

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I and lizard have huge respect for both

I and lizard have huge respect for both of them. When I enter in the room she disappears and, when she enters in the room, I go out wo bhi foran se :D :D :D

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ایک سائنسدان نے شادی کر لی..

شادی کیا ہوتی ہے ؟

یہ سمجھنے کے لیے ایک سائنسدان نے شادی کر لی....
اب اس کو سمجھ نہی آرہا کہ سائنس کیا ہوتی  ہے.....

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Police : Why didn't you report your stolen Credit Card ?

Police : Why didn't you report your stolen Credit Card ?

Santa : The thief is spending less than my Wife...
😂 😂 😜

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Young Engineer and Boss

A young Engineer was leaving the office at 5:45pm, when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in the hand.
"Listen this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary is not here. Can you made this thing work? asked the CEO
"certainly," said the Engineer. He turned on the machine, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, Excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine.  "I just need one copy."

Lesson:  NEVER, Never, Never, ever assume that your Boss Knows what he's doing😨😬😀

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?+?+?+?80+90=100

Who can solve this quiz ?

?+?+?+?80+90=100 
.
.
.
.
.
.
Answer:

Akar Bakar Bumbay Bo, 80 + 90 puray 100 !
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

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Height of getting lucky

Height of getting lucky

My neighbor's wife texted me,
"I am new on whatsapp... Any idea what does IDK, LY, TTYL mean...?"

I replied : "I don't know, Love You, Talk To You Later !"

She replied : "No problem. I'll ask you later... Love you too..."
😜😅😂

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Some fresh husband wife naughty bytes

Some fresh husband wife naughty bytes
👊👊👊👊👊😂

Wife: I hate you.
Husband: What a                                  co-incidence.

😂😂😂😂😆😆😆😆

A smart wife's note for the husband :
I am going out with my friends for dinner. Your dinner is in the recipe book, on page 25 and ingredients are available at reliance Fresh.

😂😂😂😂😂😆😆😆😆

Wife: "Darling Let's Enjoy our Saturday and Sunday"!
Husband: "Good Idea!, Let's meet on Monday....!"

😂😂😆😆😆😆😜

Boss to his friend: Kya zamana aaya hai. My secretary resigned yesterday.
Friend: Why?
Boss: She caught me with my wife in cofee shop

😜😝😛😛😝😜😝😝

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Zindagi main kamyabi Kay leeyaa Kia Karon ?

Aaj main nay ammi say poocha
Zindagi main kamyabi Kay leeyaa Kia Karon ?
Ammi baray piar say boleen
Sab say pahlay pather lay & Apna  mobile tour day 😅

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A new restaurant, named... "Topless Beauty"

Advertisement of a new restaurant, named....

"Topless Beauty"

1000 men visited on the very first day....

They were shocked to see that the restaurant had no roof...!!!

Men will be Men
Marketing is all about presentation..

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میں نے اسے انگلش میں #ILoveYou کہا تواسکا جواب اردو میں

‏جب میں نے اسے انگلش میں #ILoveYou  کہا تواسکا جواب اردو میں تھا
اور جواب تھا
بھاڑ میں جا '

تب اندازہ ہوا اس قوم کو تعلیم کی کتنی ضرورت ھے

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اسی لیےکہتا ھوں خواتین کی تعلیم ضروری ھے

‏اس قدر تعلیم کی کمی ھے
میں نے کہا اپنا وٹس  ایپ نمبر بتائیں
آگے سے بولی
جوتے کا نمبر بتاؤں ؟؟

اسی لیےکہتا ھوں خواتین کی تعلیم ضروری ھے

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جہاں جان کہنا ہوتا ہے وہاں ایک لفظ

‏خواتین کو تعلیم کی ضرورت ہے یہ اکثراردوغلط بول جاتی ہیں
جہاں جان کہنا ہوتا ہے وہاں ایک لفظ بھائی کا اضافہ کر کے" بھائی جان "کر لیتی ہیں
😏😶

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Take this gold robe & enter kingdom of heaven.

A Priest dies & is waiting in line at heavens gate.
Ahead of him is a guy, fashionably dressed, in dark sun glasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket & jeans.
God to the guy : Who r u ?
Guy : I am Karachi-Hyderabad Express Bus driver.
God : Take this gold robe & enter kingdom of heaven.
God to the Priest : Who r u ?
Priest : I am a priest & spent 40yrs preaching good to people.
God : Take this cotton robe and enter heaven.
Priest : God, how come that foul mouthed, rash driver gets a gold & I spent all my life preaching good get cotton.
God : Results, my son, results.
While you preached, people slept, when he drove, people really prayed...
☝“Its Performance, not Position that Counts !!”

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آپ کے رومال سے جو کپڑا بچے گا

اف یہ بیویاں

بیوی شاپنگ کر کے گھر آئی اور شوہر سے بولی:"دیکھئے! میں آپ کے لیے کتنا اچھا رومال لائی ہوں"َ۔
شوہر نے حیرت سے کپڑے کو دیکھا اور بولا:"اتنا بڑا رومال یہ تو کوئی چھ گز کا ہو گا"۔
بیوی بولی:"آپ کے رومال سے جو کپڑا بچے گا اس کا میں سوٹ سلوا لوں گی"۔

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Nadeem was worried that his wife was having hearing problem

***Superb Story***

Nadeem was worried that his wife was having hearing problem and he thought she might need a  hearing aid.

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

"Here's what you do,"said the Doctor, "Go home, stand about 40 feet away from her, and make a normal conversational and see if she can hear you.
If not, go closer to about 30 feet,
then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."

That evening,
his wife was in the kitchen cooking dinner, Nadeem  thought of performing the test.
He says to himself,
"I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.?"

Then in a normal tone he asks,
"Honey, what's for dinner?"

No response.

So he moves closer to the kitchen,
about 30 feet from his wife and repeats,
"Honey, what's for dinner?"

Still No response...

Next he moves to the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his Wife and asks,
"Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again he gets No response...

So, he walks up to the kitchen door,
about 10 feet away.
"Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again there is No response....

So he walks right up behind her,
"Honey, what's for dinner?"

(You'll Love this)

"For God's sake Nadeem,
its  the FIFTH time I am telling you,
its 'AALOO PARATHA'.!"
😳

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l am worried about is my height and not my...

😄😄😄
Lady to her dietician :- What l am worried about is my height and not my weight.

Doc :- How come???

Lady :- According to my weight, my height should be 7.8 feet... 😜

Now this is called positive attitude.. 👍👍😉

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